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April 2008



4.06.08 - Here's a quote I found the other day:

"The most violent element in society is ignorance." - Emma Goldman

I've been busy doing more inner work, realizing more intricate patterns, nuances of energetic tensions, and coming to understand more about consciousness. People have asked me in the past why I spend so much time on inner work, as if somehow there was something wrong with going internally. This is part of the insanity of getting people to conform to egoic insanity, of avoiding the inner and focusing on the external world. I have learned to let those people go about their business. Spirit whispered in my ear yesterday, after a long talk with my sister on consciousness, that the reason I spend so much time on the inner is because it is the only thing of any real value. It occurred to me that I spend most of my time on it because who would want to spend their time living in insanity. When you begin to realize how futile and empty the delusional world is, then the only other alternative is to awaken yourself. This process becomes your life because this is what we are at our authentic core: BEING.

Coming from this inner expansive space offers one a much more rewarding experience; and it is like the difference between night and day. The quality of peace, serenity, beauty, nurturance, support, guidance, love, joy, understanding, learning, and BEING is priceless and worth every moment spent within this presence. If your life is not enjoyable, not bringing you peace of mind, then by all means start exploring your inner self. There is much information to assist you along the way at your own comfortable pace, which is why I post varying types of information on this site.

I've been enjoying watching Eckhart Tolle and Oprah on their live event every Monday based on his book, A New Earth. You can still sign up for free for the remaining four shows as well as downloading various sized formats to fit your tastes and internet download speeds:

I had a Feldenkrais individual session last week that was quite amazing. If you are interested in understanding more about the different types of bodywork, you can check them out on my site at this address: The concept is based on natural authentic movements that have been altered by dysfunctional cultural patterns. Our egoic thought patterns negate consciousness, and in turn to shut this energetic connection down, the body has to embody rigid negating holding patterns, one could use the analogy of organic dams created to alter and stop the flow of authentic expression of Being. The body is energy and if we are taught and forced to not BE, then what has to occur is a systematic process of blocking the flows of energy. This is done by resisting the authentic impulses that arise for natural movement. When you look at small children, you will see how supple and loose they are in their movements. In essence we teach them to be uptight, which is exactly what we learn to do. You've all heard the term "tight ass," as well, which is also another systematic process that shuts down a major flow of energy. You can feel this one by simply tightening up your buttock muscles and sphincter and you will get an idea of what I am getting at. 

Even if you feel like you are not uptight, there is a tension there that one is not aware of, simply because there an incredible number of layers that are involved in shutting down complete awareness. Enlightenment is not for the few and it simply means one has removed all blocks that move one out of insanity into Being. I have been spending most of my waking time observing my ego mind as I go about my day. I have learned a lot about how it operates, how it inserts streams of negating consciousness into authentic stream, just like one does when editing a video. One has to be really present to catch these inserts, because the mechanisms that do this are extremely creative in how to weave deceptive thoughts into your authentic ones. One can be thinking creatively about a move to a new city and creating in the minds eye all the various details about what this will look like, and then discreetly a negative context will be inserted like, "but is this really realistic" or "it's probably super expensive there and I doubt I can afford it" or "maybe I won't find new friends" or "maybe the new job won't turn out like I expected." The next thing you know, your consciousness has been lowered with negating thoughts that trigger doubt, which in turn triggers the fear (contraction) response, which lowers the energetic flow of consciousness.

Fear is a tension, that contracts on the energetic level first, which then contracts on a physiological level, and then on a physical level with fascia, then the various muscles from smaller to larger ones. The body is like a rubber band so to speak, if you twist it or pull on it, tension changes all along the entire surface; the body does the same thing. One might have a problem on the left side, but it is rooted in a problem on the right side. As one becomes more aware and more in touch with their body, it is possible to begin to feel this tension to varying degrees. As we learn to extricate ourselves from the ego mind, we begin a process of letting go. This letting go is an unwinding of all the intricate ways we have learned to inhibit the flow of the life force of consciousness. Bodywork, breathwork, body movement, and intellectual learning and understanding all work together to free ourselves from the egoic imprisonment.

I have been working with this process for quite awhile and opened up into another level Friday night. I became aware of the egoic mind arising negative thoughts and simultaneously I was able to notice areas in my body tightening very subtly, and at the same moment of awareness of tightening, I consciously relaxed those areas. This interesting because I began to notice within a half hour time frame, I began to notice a space open up of peace where the ego stopped instigating, which then allowed a sense of greater joy to arise. What was so fascinating about this, was my interactions with complete strangers as I walked about taking care of errands in town. Normally people are rather abrupt, aloof, or closed off, but this time I noticed the began to open up and smile and say hello. What I am getting at here has to do with the higher finer quality of energy we can radiate if we are more open to the flow. 

The only way to explain this is to again use children as examples. People think they are drawn to children because they are so cute or adorable or some other non-sense. What they are really drawn to in them is their non-judgmental state of unconditional love, which radiates very brightly into an insane world. They are not bothered by this insanity because they are mostly allowed to BE. This begins to come to an end when they get older and wish to follow their own sovereign Being. This state that children exude is what I am getting at because this state melts away the insanity in most adults. This state is compassion, which is higher than unconditional love and it reaches through the insanity because of the purity of the light. The light that flows through young children into the world is the divine flow that the many have shut off to a trickle in themselves.

Why this melting away of the egoic aspect occurs has much to do with the negative forces that impinge upon our consciousness through the egoic functions. Darkness doesn't like light. Darkness makes a point of stifling, blocking, punishing, intimidating or injuring anyone who shines brightly. Anyone who doesn't abide by the rules of conformity to insanity is easy to notice because they are not conforming and are sane. The difference between adults and children is the level of consciousness that we can tap into that allows us to anchor in energetically in ways that prevent harm from coming to us. Think of this as an energetic field. I am reminded of the story of the Dali Lama, who was leaving a public lecture surrounded by his entourage. They approached the waiting crowd outside, where an angry man stood just ahead of the crowd. Somehow the entourage enveloped the man and the Dali Lama approached the man. The person who told this story witnessed the man's anger melt away like butter. The Dali Lama walked up to the man, shook his hand and spoke with him for a few moments before moving on. 

This presence is this level of consciousness, of energy, that is called compassion. It is like a bright radiating Sun that melts away the fear that inhabits the many. This is why it is important to focus on the body, because the body is the vehicle which we express our spirit through. If just our minds are free, then we are only partially reconnected to the higher levels of consciousness. These levels continue beyond what most can comprehend intellectually. If we are to transform the world, we must first transform ourselves to allow the inner Sun to shine forth into this darkened world. I recall a moment of wisdom presented to me as I watched some clouds to begin covering up the Summer Sun and when it was completely covered, spirit stated, while it may seem superficially that the Sun is gone, it is still shining brightly behind the clouds. Think of the clouds as the fear (tension) that covers up/blocks the inner flow of our own bright spirit to shine forth into this world. This is our blessing to the world, it is the essence of the love and compassion of our divine Mother and Father shining their presence through us into this dark place of insanity.

We are who we have been waiting for and it is each of us who awakens that becomes a teacher to others, to assist in the awakening from the mass insanity that has brought us to the brink of destruction. Let it be known that no one can snuff out the life. One may believe they have killed someone, but that person has not touched the bright Sun of spirit. This light is indistinguishable, and not even our own spirit can dowse this light/fire. When one begins to understand this concept beyond intellectual knowing then one will be sufficiently anchored and in touch with their own Being, to begin the arduous journey to awakening fully to be of service to the world in a way that is unique to our own spirit, which is in command with all that is needed to bring about an enlightened society.

We have lived for too long within a world of a small majority of people controlling the masses, and maintaining an impoverished way of being that benefits only these few. History shows us how this has occurred, and how these few have violently opposed any sort of equitable change for all. We are in the midst of this now, with vast sums of money being spent to manipulate and control the masses in the hopes that they can continue on unabated. This is nothing new because it has been going on for a long time behind the scenes. The difference is now the darkness is out in the open. We see who they are and know what they are about. We know the lies, the subterfuge, and can see what is being done, even though they may "think" they have hidden it well.

Actions do not lie and when one is in Being, as Jesus alluded too, one has eyes to see and ears to hear, which is the inner knowing that all of us are wired for. It is the open heart that senses truth being enacted. This is why so much effort has been made to shut down awareness within children, because if they were allowed to unfold into the spiritual beings they are, as we are too, then the world could not exist in this insanity. It is my belief that if parents were sane and present in Being and fully aware, then they would welcome into the world newborn infants who are already consciousness. The parents would ensure the child would protected from those external and internal elements that would seek to break this inner connection we all had at birth.

The world as we know it, our communities, governments, religions, corporations, have all been constructed to stifle awareness and consciousness in the masses. If one has eyes to see and ears to hear, they will see the signs of how the constructs of the systems have produced insanity. It is safe to awaken, for there are many who have paved the way for us to let go of the fears to embrace the Being within. It is time...


On another note, there has been some recent decisions by our insane leader George Bush, who recently rescinded all environmental laws along the Mexican border to hurry the building of the wall. It's important to see that this is similar to the Berlin Wall, of keeping out those who are undesirable. I was talking with my sister yesterday and she brought up the whole ludicrous notion that so many people have and are reacting to about illegal immigrants taking away their jobs. My sister eloquently pointed out that those who are complaining about the loss of jobs, would never take those sort of jobs with menial wages. If one can get past all the egoic rhetorical non-sense, one would see that it is nothing more than a smoke screen to find a scapegoat to shift attention away from the elites who have been busy laying people off, downsizing, sending factories overseas to sweat shops, breaking unions, and a host of other strategies created to save them money by cutting benefits, wages, and basically stealing employees hard earned pensions by letting them go before they reach the required number of years to qualify. The issue isn't the immigrants and as my sister pointed out, if they aren't going to take those menial jobs, then they ought to shut their mouths.

But that is part of the problem in that if you don't want to truly own your power, and speak up about the insanity in the world, then one has to find someone else to blame, to kick, to point the finger at, to avoid seeing dysfunctional/insane self. Those in power understand this perspective and use it to stir up friction to take the focus off their own devious plans of rape, pillage, and plunder wherever that might be in any given moment. If anybody had a quarter of their wits about them, and they bothered to spend some time truly educating themselves beyond mass media (mass hysteria), they would discover our horrible the conditions are that would motivate someone to cross the border illegally to find a way out of the incredible poverty and living conditions. Americans have been so brainwashed and carefully conditioned that they have no idea how the rest of the world lives at the hands of the insane mass consumption that is destroying the very fabric of human existence. What we have known as progress and modern this and that is extremely primitive compared to what we could truly BE, if we were free from egoic madness.

I'll say it again and again and again, that as a species, we are the only one that is polluting the very air, water, and soil we need for our very existence. We are part of Nature, we are not separate, and why it is being destroyed is part of the insanity of self-loathing and self-hatred, which seeks to destroy everything including itself. The war you see being etched out upon others and Nature is nothing more than an egoic attempt to avoid authentic self from re-connecting to Nature to heal the schizophrenic split. Our re-connection to Nature will heal the split we have within our own inner Nature. Without Nature in its fullness, we will never be able to mature into the fullness of our spiritual nature. If you haven't noticed this, look around in the suburbs and the urban areas, and you will begin to realize there are no fully matured trees that are old, let alone fully matured forests. If you have ever had the opportunity to be around really old trees, and you have felt the incredible energy and awe they emanate, then you are able to tap into what I am talking about. There is a wisdom around those old trees/forests that heals our insanity. Look at it in another way. How humans are destroying Nature is an exact reflection of the war each of our egos is waging on our inner Nature, trying to ensure we don't get back home, that we stay imprisoned.

When one begins to touch upon their own nature, and takes the challenging trek to go deeper into their own forests, the facades begin to fall away as the realization begins to arise how deep the stillness radiates. This stillness draws one into their own inner stillness in order to be guided through the natural path towards the inner bridge to spirit. This bridge was intact when we were born into the human body as spirit. To gain access to this bridge we have to purge all the energetic tensions/walls that have blocked our access to it. At some point, one realizes that this stillness in the forest is the same as the inner stillness, which then brings forth further awareness as to the miracle of the Divine in all Beings that are the complete makeup of every single thing that exists on this planet. From this perspective, if you continue to open up further, the deepening just opens up further beyond this planet, this solar system, this particular galaxy, and into the profound depths of the Universe. I would suggest reading the following about galaxies to gain a different perspective, especially if you leave your mind open to the obvious fact that all of these aspects of the Universe are sentient life forms that are far beyond anything we could conceive of in terms of consciousness.

One might say, this is ridiculous, so consider the fact that you would not exist if it were not for matter having been consolidated, formed, and structured in such a way to create the organic technological wonder called Earth. Galaxies birth stars and planets. Science tends to call them factories, as if they are merely mechanical lifeless machines; how absurd. Only a mind ruled by egoic mechanisms would see life as mechanical. Everything is alive, sentient, and highly intelligent because it is divinely connected to spirit. If you haven't had the opportunity to watch Bruce Lipton's video, then please do so, for it will open your eyes and ears to another level of consciousness. I will close with the links to his videos: Cellular biologist Bruce Lipton: "The New Biology: Where Mind & Matter Meet    Part One    Part Two

4.08.08 - I want to continue on with the topic of yesterday in regards to the creation of life by divine beings. I ran across this article about spiders that also included images through a scanning electron microscope: One specific image really just blew me away, which was of the spider's spinnerets used for weaving the silk for its web and for other uses.

Spinnerets of the widow spider Latrodectus hesperusIn general, most human beings live life on a very superficial level and through conditioning assume that is all there is. This is so because this is how our social structures and conditioning are set up. It's not that it is illegal to go deep, it's just set up through cultural conditioning and peer pressure to fit in, and the many do just that. Especially so with a carefully crafted ego agenda in control. If we were to allow our natural curiosity and inquisitiveness engage, we would begin to unravel the chains that bind our minds and begin to see another deeper dimension to life and more importantly to ourselves.

I would like to encourage you to go to the site and read the section on the spinneret and how the spider actually creates the silk threads, which is even more amazing. Look at the above image, because it is something right out of a sci-fi movie with very advanced technology. And, it is advanced, but it's advanced organic technology far beyond anything humans can create, especially given the size of the spider. When one contemplates the context of this amazing being that keeps that assists in keeping the insect population in balance, one begins to open the eyes and ears to the amazing creativity inherent in all things, for all things are Beings in ways we must open ourselves to except and honor. Everything you breathe, consume, wear, walk on, or own is alive and sentient. Most humans aren't even tuned into their own bodies, let alone the vastness of this planet and the rest of Universe we are connected with.


4.28.08 - The above post was written on 4.08.08, but I never got around to finishing my line of thoughts on it. I have been going through a lot more transformations lately, with more information and awareness coming on-line across the board. It's all I can do to just be present to assimilate all that is occurring.

A couple of Saturdays ago, I came into the building where my office/studio space is and found a small bumble bee on the floor. I was feeling tired and saw that the bee was resting as well. I reached down and put my finger next to it and it climbed up. As I have gotten more sensitive to my own energy flows, I am more sensitive to the energies of other things around me. I felt the bee's energy pulsing on my pointer finger as I went up to my office. I have seen these small bumble bees resting on fern leaves and inside flowers for 15-30 minutes at a time. I watched a big bumble bee crawl into a curled up oak leaf in a garden bed one day last month and it too rested there for some time. I suspect they are resting and communing with the plants. Humans profess to be experts on Nature and the fact of the matter is they really don't know squat about it, because they live apart from it due to being frightened of it. There's a lot more going on outside of the intellectual process the many use to know Nature. 

I collect bird feathers and sometimes find dead birds and remove their wings; I'm a Gemini an air sign. During a gallery walk a few months back, a woman came in and saw my feathers and got all excited about them, telling me she was a biologist who researched birds. She said she had a particular species in her freezer if I was interested. We got to talking and I told her about my telepathic experience with an owl and the look on her face was priceless. The conversation stopped right at that moment. She was one of those individuals who intellectualizes Nature. From a shamanic perspective, Nature's creatures are sentient and have their own innate intelligence, and if we can tap into our shamanic abilities, we would gain much wisdom and guidance. Being outdoors in Nature doing landscaping has really fine tuned my abilities to be receptive to them. It is amazing what one can come to know and understand.

So, I get up to my office space and decide to take my friends example and rest in my chair. So, we sat together and rested. I told it telepathically to let me know when it wanted to go back outside. Every once in awhile it would move about on my index finger, then moved to my middle finger, then back to my index finger. At some point, maybe an hour or so, I got up and lay down on the floor with my arms laying outwards, palms up, so the bee wouldn't be disturbed. At some point, it crawled up my arm and across my chest. I finally got up after awhile, and moved slowly as to not startle my friend. I couldn't find the bee, so I stood up slowly and began to look around, and then I heard the familiar buzzing sound. I watched the bee fly over to the open window and onto the screen. The bee was letting me know it wanted to go back outside. I went over the window and after several minutes, the bee finally got back on my finger, and I took it back outdoors. When I got outdoors, it wouldn't fly away, so I spotted a dandelion flower by a nearby tree. I went over to the flower and put my finger close to it and watched the bee crawl into the flower. I felt rested after that.

This Spring has been different than the last four because I have had a lot of large bumble bees flying around me while I am out working. I wonder what that implies?

Last Fall around November, while working with a young guy at a work site, a honey bee started flying around my head, which freaked out the guy, who is allergic to their stings. I explained to him that they are harmless, that it is our fear that they react too. It is my belief that we get stung because we our severely out of balance in our energy fields. Bees always sting on meridian points. It would do well to learn about Chinese medicine as it relates to the various meridians and the subsequent organs they relate with. So, the bee finally hovered an inch from my left ear for about 30 seconds or so. The vibrations from its wings was incredible to feel in my energy field. I felt ripples throughout my whole body. Then it flew over to the right ear and did the same thing all over again. I also felt that one as well, and had an intuitive sense that it was doing some energy balancing, using the ears as entry points for the sound/energy waves to penetrate. The guy I was with thought I was crazy. The issue is really about fear.

Letting go always releases fear, which is nothing more than a conditioned response to shutting down our flow of energy; of consciousness. Humankind has an incredible amount of letting go to do before higher states of consciousness can begin to be felt, let alone known. Nature is our ally, it is our other half, our brother and sister, our mother and father in ways that the many have no idea about. Humanity's collective insanity is born from reason and can only be healed by balancing and re-integrating outer/inner Nature into its rightful place in the collective equation.

Enjoy life, because there is a whole other reality going on around humanity that they are oblivious too. Materialism is destined to crumble and turn to dust without an inner connection. History is full of these occurrences and like the Roman Empire, this empire is going to collapse amongst its own house of cards. Those in power currently are doomed to failure because the have no personal power within their own selves. They are in power only because the masses have been duped into a con game that is utterly a facade of great distortion; sort of like The Wizard of OZ. When people wake up to their own power, they will stop being fed upon by the few that govern; it has always been so...

Inner Nature can never be suppressed forever and ultimately things come back into balance. I was watching a homeless man this evening, whom I see around town regularly. He was looking through the garbage can at a bus stop for food. I was bothered by this, more from the realization that all of Nature's creatures are taken care of by Nature. They do not in general go hungry or lack shelter, nor are they ever lacking inner guidance. Nature provides much resources for all of its kind. We are part of Nature, only humans act like they own the whole thing and can do whatever the please without regard for any of the other sentient life on this planet. Even more absurd, certain humans have forced the masses to vacate their roots from Nature, making them dependent on man-made corporate structures for everything. We used to live connected to the land and from this were nurtured and nourished. But, humanity has been led into a slavery of the intellect, where they were conditioned to disconnect from Nature and hence their own inner Nature, which has led the many to be dependent on the system to care for them, only those running the system care only about themselves. The only thing that keeps them in power is their ability to  pull the wool over the many by using fear, intimidation, coercion, manipulation, and violence. The "Establishment" has entrenched itself so deeply that it is nearly impossible to gain access; note I said nearly.

The game requires one to go along with the rules that are handed down. The only thing they didn't reckon on was the many getting tired of the game and literally stepping away from the game and refusing to play. In a weeks time of refusing to work and buy anything, the whole House of Cards would come crumbling down. The many have been trained to live in fear instead of love. Fear is a hook that imprisons one in egoic patterns. Love has no hooks, and it is where true freedom lies. The sort of freedom of egoic patterns where one can hear their own inner guidance instead of being dependent on the rule mongers to tell one what to do, think, say, and be. It is all a lie, for they have no power over your Being. And the game is in place to prevent you from knowing true Being. Set yourself free; know thy self. What one needs to understand is the entrenchment is not a physical thing, though it may be perceived in that manner. The entrenchment, the establishment is nothing more than an established rigid thought process that has been trained into humans. The good news is that learning never ends and it is your ticket to freedom. Freedom of thought requires the faculty of discernment, which is dependent on the faculties of intuition and feelings to navigate effectively through the obstacles that block one from accessing the higher mind portal.


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