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"Finding Ones Self"

 

I came to college to find myself

I realize that now

Education is about finding yourself

if you choose to open up and see

Everything that presents itself

 

I have found myself in more ways than I imagined

Moved so far beyond the boundaries of society

E-go-cen-tris-m-is-a-eu-phe-mis-m

 

Peer pressure is the bond

                that binds us

                                limits us

                                            controls us

It is the force that takes us

            away

                            from ourselves

                                            our freedom

 

I guess that's what's so disturbing

Once you have your freedom

What do you do with it?

 

For so long have I followed the norm

I have no awareness of what I wish to do with it

I sit at the periphery of society

            Clueless

                                 no program

                                              to operate

                                                     Me

My Self

                sits idle

                                waiting

                                                      for someone

                                                                           to command me

                                                                               to do the

                                                                                         right

                                                                                                         thing

 

The ability to wait in this mode is infinite

Where is that part of me that used to know

Where the hell did it go

 

I watch the children and I know

I used to sing and dance

                            play and create

                                            express and draw

                                                            and love so fiercely

 

I used to know what to do

I used to know who I was

I know this is true

 

I used to know

            my thoughts

                        my desires

                                        my dreams

 

You know, I lived them

I used to wonder in awe

Now I just wonder

 

When I watch the children be themselves

I feel the joy

            sense of wonder

                           being care free

                                        and the love

 

Can it be a dream to believe

To strive for this in a disillusioned world

to dream

                to imagine

                                to create

 

Somewhere on this planet

Amongst the billions of Souls

 

            A few like minded beings

            Who desire the things they know

 

                    That wait beyond the walls

                    To remember who they used to be

 

                                The only life worth living

 

Sherman R. Buck

January 19, 1998