SHERMAN'S PERSONAL POLYAMORY PAGE:
Welcome to my personal page on polyamory. I'm in the process of beginning to be more in alignment with my Being. It's time to begin to find others who are interested in living authentic lives based on mutual respect for each person's right to be a sovereign being and to love without limitations, judgments, expectations, other than just allowing the other to be. In this state of being, one comes from a place of unconditional love, knowing that each person has many facets and needs in being, and as such, there is no desire for them to live up to your expectations. Peter Russel's quote fits quite well here:
Love is not something you do,
It is not how you behave.
There's nothing you can do that constitutes loving another,
No action that is of itself loving.
Love is a way of being.
And more than that.
It is simply being,
Being with another person, however they may be.
Holding no judgments, having no agendas,
No need to have them experience your love,
No desire to demonstrate love,
No intrusion upon their soul.
Nothing but a total acceptance of their being,
Born of your total acceptance of yours.
This is going to be a challenge for most to understand, since we live in a society that the other is supposed to be our other half, the one to fulfill all our needs, and make us feel loved and accepted. However that may be, we are ultimately response-able for this first and foremost. If you cannot love yourself first, no one else will ever be able to love you because you have not accepted your own self-love. Read my journal for more on this concept of self-love versus self-hate. If we are not in self-love, then we will attract to us those that aren't as well. I often here people ask, "why can't I find someone to love me?" Well, it stems from the fact that we attract to us those who mirror how we feel about ourselves. This is not a simple concept to grasp in our self-hating society.
Needless to say, as each of us steps into self-love, and begin the process of loving all aspects of our Being, then we will begin to create loving relationships. My own realizations are that I love males and females. My spectrum tends to run more towards males than females. I am not interested in monogamy, nor am I wanting to have a typical dysfunctional nuclear family model of Being. Based on my own inner awareness of the divine, I do not see monogamy as a healthy model of self-love, Being, or in alignment with unconditional love. This particular paradigm ignores the incredible depth to who we are as a divine Soul. But, as you will find in my journal writings and elsewhere on the site, most are not aware of their soul, let alone the divine in a direct knowing experience. The Divine is not monogamous in its love towards us, nor does this principle apply towards male and female mystics who have felt the divine make love to them on an energetic level. The implications of this are that the Divine loves all equally without exception. Ironically, even in our separation, when we are not aware of the divine, it loves us still, being in a constant state of giving to us of our spiritual essence, which is to say it gives from itself to us; in all ways; always.
This state of giving is the core of our soul being, it is what we are and what we do in our state of being. Since we are love itself, there is no need to withhold love, since love itself is limitless in its eternal essence. All that exists is love and made from love and so that makes us love, powered by love, with more than enough to always be in a state of giving to the other without expectations. Should the other choose to leave, then it is not about who or what we are, but rather they feel on some level a need to move on. This is our true nature of being in alignment with Soul-self. We have lived many lives in different genders, orientations, bodily forms and as such cultural rules have no bearing on soul expression. Cultural rules only apply to those who live in separation and non-being. Being is Soul; non-being identifies with human form. We are not our bodies, rather we inhabit their loving essence as vehicles for this particular incarnation in order to experience this realm and to be creative here for various reasons.
Loving unconditionally requires Being authentic, to arise from our soul self, where we express our true nature of integrity, honesty, and giving. In this Soul-self state we love whomever we are attracted too. When we are conscious of Being soul, then we do not use others to fill our emptiness, for we are already full from the divine within. When two people come together from this state of being, there arises only giving from both sides and since we are already complete, we are not in a state of taking; there is no hunger/greed to need the other. When in a state of wholeness and completeness, then we are able to receive without having expectations. We are able to give because we enjoy giving without expectations as well. Two people coming together in giving without expectations, lavish each other with the divine essence of love that moves beyond the limitations of the current state of unconditional love. In this state of Being, there are no judgments about the other as to where they are in their giving state and in stumbling or faltering or hesitating in expressing one's divine essence, the other remains true to their soul self so as to allow the other to realign with their soul self. Soul's heal other souls for the sake of being in alignment with unconditional love. Eternity teaches us to love unconditionally and we are put to the test to do this time and time again.
Updated: 6/24/07